The Party
by Lotus Aia
Summary: [yaoi Sasunaru] Sasuke is invited to a party, which he refuses heatedly. Naruto baits him enough though, to a point where the taunts force him to go. Sasuke, with a small infatuation for the blonde, plans to ruin Naruto's fun. COMPLETE
1. Motivation of the blonde kind

I've started... three or four chaptered stories and I'm still dragging them out. I'm sorry. So what do I do? I start another one. Cheers!

Sky.Bloo.Pink! This is your request! With a LotusAia twist, I'm sure. XP Enjoy! (pssst... hey... I take requests if you didn't know...)

* * *

The Party

* * *

Sasuke Uchiha was not a normal teenager. Everyone agreed to that, but felt this irresistible pull to have him included in their teenage lives. The cool Uchiha was just that; so cool. He was brooding, beautiful, dark, mysterious, and _appealing._ A fangirl club of Sasuke worshipers watched his every move, noted every glance, and documented anything even slightly from his normal routine. And they lived for this. Boys wanted to be his friends, or closer, just because he was the talk of the generation. He was what everyone wanted, or wanted to be. 

And the hell that the Uchiha brat didn't know that.

He smirked at the waves he could make by simply saying something out of the ordinary, such as, "What a pretty sky today." There would be throngs of people gathered around discussing his state of mind, if he'd gone mad, if the boy was possibly sick.

Not only did Sasuke enjoy his power, he used it to his advantage. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd had to train alone. Whenever he needed an ass to kick, there was always an ass-kisser with a waiting booty to be pounded into the dirt.

Of course, he had his few reliable friends. Those that didn't care for his popularity among the girls or the lower ranks, and more of ignored his bitchy attitude more than anything.

Kiba was obnoxious, but he could stand the dog lover. Shino and Shikamaru were probably his favorite hang out friends (if Sasuke ever in his life chose to hang out with someone, which he didn't). The two were quiet and didn't bother him, therefore the Uchiha liked them. Chouji ate too much and trained too little, but he was amusing to watch. Then there was Naruto.

That blonde, obnoxious, Ramen eating, obnoxious, loud, obnoxious, moronic team mate of his. Naruto had to be the most flaring and attention-grabbing person that ever walked the face of any village. If the Dobe even _knew_ there was a bridge named after him, he probably couldn't get any louder about all the other feats he'd done in his life. And more so that pissed Sasuke off, was that Naruto was the only one who openly made fun of him.

No one made fun of an Uchiha. It was just unheard of. The brazen challenges and the barefaced taunts were at first shocking. Sasuke had never met anyone so stupid as to make fun of _him._ The unashamed orphan was indeed a black sheep. _No, not a sheep_. Sasuke mulled to himself. Naruto did not follow the flock. He didn't go with the flow and listen to the shepard. Instead, Naruto was a _fox._ Minus the sly and cunning. Courageous, but no where near sly, and far from cunning. But a fox indeed.

And that is why Sasuke obsessed over him. He watched the blonde, he analyzed every motion, even smile. He'd even categorized Naruto's moods, when the best time to approach him was, when he was less likely to demand a fight and ask for Ramen instead. Sasuke, through all the snide remarks and smirking scoffs _always_ bought Naruto ramen when he asked. The blonde was crazy. Sasuke liked crazy. Sasuke _loved_ crazy.

o0O0o

"Sasuke!"

He winced. _Fangirl, 11 o'clock._

He tried to avoid the run in by dodging into Ichiraku with some type of purposeful look. He plopped down in the far corner and tried to meld to the shadows.

"Oi! Teme! I was sitting there!" A certain Uzumaki pointed angrily at his jacket that was draped over the chair. "A guy can't go to the bathroom without having his seat stolen!" he bemoaned so loudly that the entire shop turned to stare.

Sasuke had turned red and was glaring with all his might, though every glare he'd ever sent the boy was rejected by _stupidity_. "Shhhh! Naruto you're so frickin' loud, would you stop-?"  
"Sasuke! There you are! And Naruto, you need to stop calling him that! It's so rude!" Ino landed a well placed punch across the back of Naruto's head, sending him over a bar stool to the ground.

Sasuke winced, watching the blonde gripe and whine at her. She ignored him completely though, instead her eyes lighting up with love and passion as she leaned forward towards Sasuke, "Heeeey, Sasuke, listen. I know you don't really do the party scene or anything, but we're throwing a 'thank god we're all alive' party and well… we wanted you to come, too!" She beamed brightly and held out an invitation.

He stared at the extended paper. "I haven't gone to the last seven. So save the paper and give it to someone else. Maybe Naruto would enjoy something loud and obnoxious."

Naruto, having picked himself up off the floor and snatched his bowl of ramen from Sasuke's vicinity, glared at the blunt boy beside him. "I'm helping to put it on, asshole. So shut up a stop being such a cry baby. We all know that you're not going because you can't handle your stupid claustrophobia." he grinned ruthlessly.

After having just lost the color in his cheeks, it didn't take long for the Sasuke to regain the tint. "I am _not_ claustrophobic." he snarled. "And don't-!"

"Then why were you clinging to me on our last mission in the tunnels, eh? You were all sweaty and gross and clingy!" The kitsune's face screwed up in a defying contortion.

Scowling, the brooding boy let fly a thump to the already existing lump on Naruto's head. "Dobe." he muttered, standing up and glaring. "I don't like parties."

This time Naruto hit back, "You're just a loser, that's why! Can't stand the thought of people possible _touching _your pretty boy clothing? Or will all the dancing and decibels mess up your perfect hair-do?" he taunted, all the while inhaling the rest of his ramen.

Sasuke slammed the invitation down on the table beside Naruto's bowl, broth sloshing across the paper. "I'll come to your stupid party, and I'll ruin your good time just so I can see the look on your face." he sneered, the spite dripping through the grin as he sauntered out of Ichiraku's.

Ino watched him go, Naruto silently smirking in victory. He just _loved _getting under the Uchiha's skin.

"Now look what you've done!" Ino issued another punishing blow. "You've pissed him off! I HATE you Naruto!" she stormed out, clutching her invitations unintentionally hard.

Naruto only rubbed the back of his head and turned back to what was once a peaceful lunch. He sighed and leaned over the bowl, "Maybe Shikamaru will be in a less violent and quieter mood." he mused, head dipping forward to suck up another full-sized bite.

* * *

Bite me! I need inspiration to finish what I start! I'm such a loser. 

-Aia


	2. Sasuke's first party

Thank you all for so many reviews on the first chapter! And the census declared booze, so uh... thar be booze in this here chapter. Arg... (wannabe pirate author Aia)

... Yeah, so enjoy the second chapter. >.>

* * *

The Party, part 2

* * *

The word had swept through the teenage masses of Konoha village. _Sasuke was going to a party_. It was worthy of discussion in every clique of every type, and any rank that knew anything about the Uchiha's ways.

Sasuke on the other hand, was quite content with the wave of chaos he had sent through the social teenage generation of his. The only person to lack the awe-inspired or ecstatic excitement was the one and only Naruto Uzumaki. Sasuke would expect nothing less of the brat though, he was too indignant to care if his arch rival was going to a party he was throwing.

The last Sasuke had heard was that Naruto was even trying to take credit for Sasuke's coming. In the end, that was true. But what was more amusing than an ignored Naruto?

o0O0o

There was nothing fashionable about being late, according to Sasuke Uchiha. Being 'fashionably late' was just a wanna-be excuse for saying, "I can't do anything right, even get somewhere on time." Kakshi-sensei was a different story altogether. He was excluded from the Uchiha theory.

Not that Sasuke's beliefs kept him from being two hours late to the party. His excuse was that if he had to be there, he would like to spend the least amount of time in the place. In all reality, he had fallen asleep on the couch after dinner. Such is the life of a rich orphan boy.

Shikamaru smirked at the approaching figure in the night, hands tucked deep in pockets and a sulking expression greeting the shadow nin. "Well, look what the cat dragged in." Nara drawled, leaning against the doorframe.

"What?" Sasuke grunted, glaring beneath long black eyelashes. "Are you supposed to be the bouncer or something?"

He shook his head lazily, "Naw… just catching some sleep before things get too wild in there. Parties are so tiresome."

From inside a holler echoed loud enough to rattle the windows and scare a cat across the road.The yell reverberated through the house with joy. Laughter followed above the music, then a crash, continued laughter rising.

"Sounds like a regular blast." Sasuke muttered darkly, eyes staring ahead flatly. He attempted to recall how he'd been duped into coming. Ah, that's right. His obsession.

"Suck it up, Uchiha. Go in and see what we really do when you're home in your bunny slippers asleep on your couch." he smirked, pushing the door open with one hand.

Sasuke's lips lifted in a scowl. "I hate bunnies."

"You would."

As soon as he had stepped in, Sasuke regretted ever being taunted into such a mess. Teenagers. He despised them really. Why couldn't his generation be mature? In the direct center of the huge living room stood a keg almost as tall as Sasuke himself. Alcoholic beverages littered the area, some half full and forgotten, some empty and stepped on, but most were knocked over after once being completely full. The distinct smell of _drunk_ was just beginning to radiate from the room, but not heavy yet since it was only the first two hours.

"This is stupid." he muttered, staring around at his peers in disappointment. He took them to be too innocent sometimes.

"Sasukeeeeeeeeeee!"

The entire party seemed to turn and stare at him, eyes averting from a mess on the floor that incorporated broken glass and something orange.

Before a group of fangirls encompassed Sasuke's being, he caught a glance of Naruto standing up from the floor and the broken glass while laughing. Parlor tricks gone array by the looks of it. Moments later, Sasuke was engulfed in a swarm babbling, pleading, molesting girls. "Off…!" he would mutter every now and then in a tone that incited chills through the spine. "Get off me…" he pushed through the flock using a variety of Uchiha death glares and sharp elbows, emerging with slight damage to his clothing on the other side.

Damn. He liked that shirt.

_And_ they'd messed up his hair. He'd only been here for five minutes!

_Splsh!_

No. There was not wine on his shirt. There was not red wine on his shirt. He lifted his shirt and smelled the liquid. It was red wine.Who the hell had red wine? They were about to die. His eyes flashed up in seething anger, but he could see the empty bottle of cheep wine rolling on the floor at his feet. It was a mystery really, how it only took him three minutes to have his clothing ruined immediately.

"Awwuuuuuu!" A hollering _fool_ caught Sasuke in the shoulder as he passed. As the confused boy blinked and tried to catch sight of what had just nearly run him over, Sasuke was greeted with a round white ass and fuzzy black hair. It looked suspiciously like Kiba. The guess was confirmed as Akamaru came zipping by, yapping just as gaily as his master.

"Oh. My. Gawd." Sasuke felt more out of place and violatedthan he ever had his entire life. With a firm step away from an oncoming second throng of fangirls, he dodged into what appeared to be the kitchen. Immediately, he hesitated on whether this move had been a wise choice or self-destrucive.

"Sasuke!" A chorus of baritone laughs rejoiced to his presence. "You made it! Did you see Kiba? He is expressing his youth-youth-bwhahahaha! Neji put him up to it!" Lee doubled over into spurts of laughter.

A single delicate eyebrow rose on Sasuke forehead. "How much has Lee had to drink?"

Chouji thumped Lee on the back a good one, "He doesn't drink. Gai sensei told him it weakened the body."

Lee stood upright in a flash, green body suit looking slightly disheveled in any case, "I am alcohol free! But I am high on the youthful spirit of our generation!" he declared, sloshing a soda down his arm in glorious display of the drunken 'spirit'occupying the living room.

"He's still amusing." Shino muttered with a snort, throwing back a slug of beer casually.

Sasuke watched in interest, his usual 'friends' or at least training partners, were much more casually mature than the rest of the non-nin teens that littered the premises. A proud feeling of association began to well in Sasuke's stomach, but hequenched it. For now, he would settle himself in here, for they seemed sober enough at the moment.

With little warning though, or even a yell of approach, Kiba barreled through the kitchen doorway, panting, and curious as to who he'd just bowled into Chouji. No harm done, for whoever it had beenbounced off harmlessly anyway. The rest of the group though, had turned stone silent and wide eyed. "What?" Kiba was attempting to reclothe himself awkwardly, "Hey, you assholes put me up to that, pay up!" He stuck one hand out expectantly.

Neji motioned downward with one finger to point at the fuming Uchiha.

Kiba didn't need another hint. He had just _knocked overUchiha Sasuke._"On second thought, keep the twenty bucks." he turned, pants held up by one hand and shirt forgotten, to dash back to the chaotic party in the other room.

Sasuke stood and growled heatedly. He was done. There was no getting around how done he was with this display of immaturity."Where's Naruto?"

The four pointed in the direction Kiba had scampered off to.

The peeved Uchiha turned sharply, settling firmly with himself that his only mission was to hunt down the yellow headed brat before getting the hell out of this mess. He was in no mood for such ridiculous antics. He'd been mauled by fangirls, he'd been spewed on with red wine, he'd been knocked over by a streeker... this needed to be over.

"Aaah! Sasuke!" Sakura caught him just as he stepped from the kitchen. The drunken pink haired girl giggled with glee, cross eyed for the most part. "Ooooh, Sasukeeee…. you look soo priiitty tonight..." she draped across his chest like a second shirt.

Naruto was going to get it for putting him through all this. All logic aside, the Uchiha was definitely blaming his entire predicament on the lamentably soon-to-be-dead Uzumaki. Oh yes, it was his fault. And he would pay.

* * *

Saaa... so here we have Sasuke's first party experience... not exactly joyful, but rememberable, ne? 


	3. To the Top of Terrible

Whew, sorry this took so long! College is kicking my butt. DX It's a sad sad thing when I can't even find the time to write yaoi.

o0O0o

_The Party, part 3_

o0O0o

Sasuke was angry, to say the least. Though confusion plagued his thoughts and frustration shook his mind, his body could not help but twitch every now and then when Sakura managed to get in a grope. "Stop it." He snapped, the girl merely staggering and giggling.

"Ooooh, Sasuke you're so CUTE!"

The words were magical, even if drunken and smelling of dead animals. Throngs of girls heard the fellow call of an inebriated female, and rushed forward to join in the melody. And groping.

"Ooooh, Sasuke! You are _soooo_ hot tonight!"

"Dance with us, Sasuke, dance with us!"

"I –hic- love you-! Oooh… sorry, did I just get sick on your shoes…?"

Hands from everywhere were feeling his body and violating his personal bubble like never before. Needless to say, Sasuke had been in situations where he'd been forced in close quarters. But he had not been finger raped by his fellow shinobi in those moments. During missions, any contact was strictly business. During parties, all contact was strictly categorized as _molestation._

"Get OFF me!" he bellowed, attempting to shake the extra attachments he appeared to have grown. A wet sticky feeling was creeping into his left sock, but he noticed quickly that it had started at his left shoulder and dribbled down to his shoe. He fought for all he as worth, managing to hurl one particularly intoxicated teenage girl a good four feet into a couch that had already been occupied. The couple didn't appreciate the extra company.

He snagged a second girl that looked ready to heave all over him, and gave her a fast shove into a third attacker, watching the two stumble then topple over in giggles.

At this point, an exit of escape had opened up in a minimal amount of time. Shinobi skills jumped into action and he dive rolled out of the mass of gaggling females. The chuunin was not, to say the least, someone who retreated often. But special circumstances allowed special actions, so the Uchiha took flight like a jail bird.

Free from disaster, worse for wear and particularly sticky, Sasuke snarled and death glared anyone that dare come near him. Naruto was going to pay. With his _virginity_ if Sasuke could manage it. Stupid girls. Stupid beer. Stupid party.

"Sasuke!" A jovial voice, sounding particularly under the influence, wavered towards the fuming ninja. "Hey, hey… come check this out…" Tenten grinned widely, her flushed cheeks and wobbling steps information enough that she was not behind in the party in any way. To the back of her, a slightly dazed Hinata was following at a cautious pace.

"T-t-tenten?" she mumbled, fingers attempting to tap together but never making the direct line to meet. She was latching onto the hem of the taller girl's dress, eyes looking particularly discolored. "Um, I-I don't feel so good."

Tenten whirled around dramatically to stare at the Hyuuga girl, "Don't give me that you light weight! You've only had twofer gosh-shakes!" she staggered and grabbed Hinata's wrist, then Sasuke's. "Let's go watch them duct tape Shikamaru to the keg!" she declared, far to exuberant about the whole ordeal.

Sasuke numbly followed, half out of intrigue, half because he knew Naruto _must_ have something to do with it.

Indeed, the Uzumaki problem child was laughing boisterously as he tossed the duct tape to Kiba, then visa versa. Shikamaru was out like a light, as asleep as the dead except smelling of life and booze. Sasuke watched in fascination as the more than acceptable ninja was duct taped from shoulders to ankles to the large keg in the middle of the room. How he didn't wake up could only be accredited to a jutsu, for sure.

Or maybe alcohol really was that dangerous? To completely annul the wits and ingeniousness of Nara was an indication in itself that booze was _not_ acceptable for a shinobi to be around. Maybe he could later use this knowledge to his fortune?

Sasuke smirked, now was his chance!

He lunged forward between the mass of laughing people, aiming a well place grab to Naruto's forearm. A sudden _pop_ informed him in a dramatic exit, that it was not the real Naruto. Sasuke was clutching a six pack and the crowd was roaring with laughter again. A second molestation began, the six pack being devoured and his clothes becoming scarce.

"DOBE! You'll pay for this!" Sasuke howled.

Naruto snickered and sunk back into the crowd.

o0O0o

_Plan of action: _

_1. Locate by various means one Uzumaki Naruto. _

_2. Upon location, entrapment must be used. Jutsu: Chakra rope_

_3. Begin operation _Molestation Uzumaki_. Perhaps tie him to bed. Begin with tongue._

_4. When he gets to hard to handle, remove pants from Uzumaki. That will teach him a lesson._

_5. Get Naruto off, leave party in a mysterious cloud, and keep him curious._

_6. Make him want me._

o0O0o

It seemed like ages since Sasuke had arrived at the party. A glance at a clock informed him that he'd been there nearly two hours. The bad luck his mission seemed to have attained was driving him mad. _Why_ couldn't he find Naruto? Step two could not be acted upon without the completion of step one.

Figuring that the best plan of action would be to ask around, he squirmed back towards the kitchen where the more mature group had been hanging out. True, it had been an hour or two since then, but maybe he would get lucky.

"Aaah, Sassssukeeee…" Someone stumbled into his back, a beer sloshing forth to drench a once pristine piece of Sasuke's shirt. The _last_ pristine piece of Sasuke's shirt.

"Hn… Neji?"

"Yes. You know, you and I are a lot of like. You know that, Sasukkkke?" Neji put an arm around his victim's shoulders. "I think destiny… brought you to this party…and me… and you…"

"Actually, Naruto brought me." Sasuke muttered flatly, knowing in the back of his mind that whatever he said would not pass the inebriated barrier on Neji's head. Slowly, the byukagen user was growing louder in octaves, depicting the three fate sisters on a mountain drinking vodka and something else that Sasuke couldn't quite understand.

"You, Sasuke… should find yourself a strong man…. a man of… of good bloodline."

"Get off me."

"Get you off? Right here? There are bed-hic-bedrooms…"

"Neji, I think Hinata just glared at you."

"Where!" He turned an angry eye to the crowd.

Sasuke made a break for it, once again pulling his sober shinobi skills into action. He rolled and tossed a single shuriken back, pinning the crotch of Neji's pants to the wall. The Hyuuga stumbled, then fell in a daze, still holding his beer in safety though.

Congratulating himself on a situation well avoided, Sasuke smirked the trademark smirk of arrogance. Noticing that Neji had somehow unpinned himself, he slunk back down the hallway in search for a place to rest and reconstruct his Plan Of Action.

"Sasuke!" A high pitched voice sounded _thrilled _at his presence, translating to Sasuke that he needed to escape before she got any closer.

He opened a door and stepped in, closing and locking it behind him. He listened for a moment, hearing the girl babble in confusion as she walked by. The Uchiha Smirk of All Knowing returned, and he eased slightly.

"Um…wassup, Sasuke?"

He froze and swiveled his neck to face the bedroom.

Kami-sama_, no._

On top of the covers of a particularly boring looking bed spread, lay none other than his fellow ninjas in action. Literally, in action. Kiba and Shino were panting, but vaguely sidetracked from their intimate situation with the dark headed Uchiha clan member.

"…" Sasuke could only stare in horror, shock rendering his body useless. They were _not_ naked, they were _not_ grinding their manhoods together, and they were most definitely _not_ having sex in a bedroom that Sasuke had just walked into. His stomach did several flips before he finally snarled through clenched teeth, "Lock. The. F-ing. Door." The red faced boy whipped around and exited as quickly as possible. He stomped stiffly down the hallway and re-emerged into the party area.

He was done.

No more.

There was nothing he could do to Naruto that would equal the amount of sheer terror this party had thrown upon him. He was violated, scarred for life, bleeding from the nose, and covered in alcohol that he never even got a chance to drink.

From somewhere down the hall, hidden by a clever jutsu masked by the sheer amount of people and chakra that was already mingling… giggled a malicious blonde shinobi.

o0O0o

XP So, Sasuke's going a bit bonkers. Neji hitting on him probably didn't help his mental state.


	4. And It All Came Tumbling Down

Hello, and sorry for the loooong wait in between chapters. College pretty much hates me. But Yaoi is my friend, so I have returned with more Sasuke scheming/tormenting. Onwards! Oh, and uh, sorry for the shortness, but I promise the next one is the big ending!

* * *

The Party, part 4

* * *

Naruto could never pass up the chance for a good prank, be it with malicious intent or for a few good giggles. This prank though, was an all out conspiracy attack on the remaining evil heir of the Uchihas. Not only was there one main brat involved, their were several accomplices.

Uzumaki peaked his head into the bedroom where Kiba and Shino were reclothing themselves casually. "How'd it go? He came out sporting a bloody nose!" he grinned at their triumph.

"You should have seen his face!" Kiba roared with laughter at the replay image in his mind. "I had to wrestle Shino's clothes off'im, but it went smoothly anyway. Sasuke looked ready to flee the place, though. Better catch him." The dog boy had a grin from ear to ear that rivaled that of even Naruto's.

Shino had the decency to blush though, covering himself with the pants he'd yet been able to get on. "You'll do just about anything if you can be naked." He mumbled.

Kiba howled and then tackled Shino to the bed. "I haven't ravished you completely yet tonight!" he declared happily, loosing his pants again in the melee. Shino, half under the influence, only struggled with slight desperation, finally giving in to the wet mouth.

-.- Elsewhere -.-

Sasuke desperately clawed his way through the waves of people that surged into him, then away, then behind him, and into a wall. He snarled and took to desperate matters, flinging those that got in his path _out_ of his way. No more Mr. Nice Uchiha. Or more so, no more Mr. Slightly Kind of Polite Uchiha. He was taking the violent route.

"Sasuke! Fait has brought us together!"

Sasuke's blood ran cold and he tried to get away from the clutches of the drunken Byukagen user. He thrashed about and finally dislodged himself from the clutches of pale needy fingers. Neji watched him go and frowned a bit, huffing a sigh and turning to look around the crowd for the team leader.

Naruto had backed from the room where Kiba and Shino had re-started their game of 'fake' sex. He transformed, looking around for his allies in crime, and the only real shinobi that were at the party. White orbs of death and destruction were the first he caught glance with. The two met in the middle, the crowd ebbing and flowing in torrents to squish them once in a while. "Where'd he go?" Naruto bellowed over the noise.

"He's trying to get to the door! I tried to stop him but he went berserk and threw me off." Neji rubbed his cheek where he'd caught an unexpected elbow to the face.

Naruto giggled to himself and made a Gai-like thumbs up. "Got it, I'm on him!" He declared, taking one strong leap and meeting the hanging light that rocked slightly from the ceiling at his weight. He surveyed the scene, then snickered at seeing a maul of obsessive fan girls had slowed Sasuke's escape.

Everything was going to plan!

o0O0o

_The Plan:_

_1. Taunt Sasuke into coming to party._

_2. Get all the girls drunk, then point them at Sasuke. Do this as many times as necessary._

_3. Choose several or all of the following pranks:_

_a. Pay Neji to drunkenly flirty with Sasuke._

_b. Give Sakura tequila, send her after Sasuke._

_c. Give Ino Vodka, send her after Sasuke._

_d. Give all girls drinks and pictures of Sasuke, so they can match the blurry photo with their blurry vision._

_e. Spike Lee's soda… tell him Sasuke challenged him to a dual._

_f. Put Shino and Kiba in bed together, force Sasuke into the room._

_g. Get his clothes messy._

_h. Mess up his hair._

_4. When Uchiha is royally pissed off, capture him as he walks out the door, and raise him to second story window that is above front door._

_5. Tie him to bed._

_5b. Make sure no one else is in the room._

_6. Ravish Uchiha thoroughly. Leave him tied to bed._

o0O0o

Naruto kicked his feet forward, then back, forward, then back. The pattern repeated until he had a high enough arch in his swing that ceiling light had begun to creak in pain. He let go, sailing through the air… just like a rock thrown by a two year old. He had just enough time to declare, "BONZAIIIII!" Before hurtling straight into Sasuke's head and taking the rest of him down as well. He smashed the Uchiha, face to groin, into the floor and laughed maniacly. "Your mine!"

Grabbing the back of Sasuke's dirtied and uglied shirt, he gave one last heave and had Sasuke outside the home where a waiting chakra rope dangled in wait. Before the Uchiha could regain his sense of self, he was being hoisted through the cool night air and leaving a maniacal freak laughing on the ground. All to soon though, the evil prankster had hopped up the drain pipe, giving Sasuke a shove into the open window above and dumping him on the floor rudely. "Got you, you Uchiha bastard." Naruto smirked in delight.

Sasuke's heart was torn between intense fear and frenzied infuriation. "Dobe, I'm going to kill you with my bare hands as soon as I get out of these ropes. And I _will_ get out of _your_ stupid trap." He assured through clenched teeth.

Naruto giggled, "Maybe… if I hadn't prepared with at least eight of them."

Sasuke's eyes widened and his throat stopped up just slightly. Naruto had _planned ahead?_ This could only mean a dreadful future for the Sharingan heir.

* * *

Only edited once. Again, time is low in stock. The corner store recently ran out. A shame, really. 


	5. It Was A Nice Shirt

I am. SO. Sorry. I know that was a ridiculous amount of time and all I come up with is 1512 words. Forgive me, and I will give you as many sugary morsels as your tummy can hold.

* * *

The Party, part 5

* * *

Chilling realization ran down Sasuke's neck when Naruto's vicious grin disappeared to circle around behind him. Chakra ropes of the best grade where being wound around the Uchiha's body. He could feel the wet spills and the dirty party grime on his clothes being synched against his body.

Naruto bore a stance of triumph, eyeing his prize in victory.

"You've got me tied up, dobe. Now what the hell do you want?" Sasuke's mind reeled at the realization he'd been capture by his enemy before he'd even attained a chanced to execute the first phases of his plan. This was not how his story was supposed to end.

"What am I going to do with you?" Naruto parroted, snickering. He tossed his hands behind his head nonchalantly and rocked back on his heels. "Oh, not much, really." He approached his bound prey, grinning. "Let's see... we can start with..." The blonde fox took out a kunai, Sasuke's heart rising to his throat.

The kunai flicked out once, then twice, slicing open Sasuke's ruined shirt. With a few more quick cuts, the shirt fell open in the front, some pieces floating down to settle at their feet.

Naruto stood back a few steps, hands on his hips while he admired his prey. The Uchiha heir looked well into anger and bordering the edge of fearful. His shirt, what once was an expensive tailored piece, was now ugly and mostly missing.

What was the point of that though? To ruin a shirt that had already long been disgraced by the likes of merry party-goers. Sasuke gasped slightly as a hand reached out, Naruto's finger tips trailing up the bear chest, then back down. One little finger took a moment to delve in the bellybutton there, then slipped out and brushed the edge of Sasuke's waistband.

Sasuke, to his merit, was starting to gather an understanding of his situation. Was that _lust_ in Naruto's eyes? Did he see a lecherous gleam to those animalistic features of Uzumaki's? "Pervert." Sasuke smirked knowingly, chin lowering as he stared down the other boy with gleeful anticipation. "You were stalking me the whole night, weren't you?" he challenged the blonde.

Naruto smirked, "You're tied up with extra thick chakra rope, and you're all alone. Are you sure you want to be taunting me like that, bastard?" He slid the sharp side of the kunai down Sasuke's chin teasingly, pointing out that he really did have the upper hand.

"Pheh. Like you'd kill me."

"Who said anything about wanting to kill you?" The blonde gave his captive a bizarre glare.

"No one. I'm just pointing out that I can handle anything you try and shove on me." he smiled, licking his lower lip tauntingly.

Naruto raised his chin a bit to stare down his nose at Sasuke thoughtfully. The Uchiha wasn't being nearly as panicky and whiny as he'd hoped. "Hmph." He pursed his lips and cocked his head to the left, considering his options. "_Anything_, Teme? You can handle... _anything?_"

"Anything." Sasuke confirmed, a challenging sneer tracing his lips.

Naruto accepted the silent invite from his rival. In one smooth movement, the blonde leaned forward and crushed his lips into the awaiting mouth before him. Sasuke opened wide, allowing lips, tongue, and any other sweet thing Naruto had to offer. There was a simultaneous groan, followed by a slight scuffle as Naruto tried to gain dominance over the other boy with a huff. He jerked back when teeth sunk into his lower lip painfully.

Sasuke hissed a soft laugh, licking the sweet foreign saliva from the out regions of his mouth. "What's amatter, Dobe, can't handle a little teeth? What did you expect if you brought me up here to mouth molest me." he titillated the younger boy with glee at the flustered blush he was returned.

Naruto was hesitant, but he could not deny the obvious sexual craving Sasuke was freely revealing. "What the hell is your problem?" Naruto snorted a half smile, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. "Aren't you the least bit freaked? Any other person would be." He murmured half seriously, half in annoyance that his master plan to scare Sasuke shitless had partly failed. He could always chock up half a victory to the neurotic twitch Sasuke had developed while downstairs in that foreign land of hormones, music, and booze.

Sasuke shook slightly in his bonds, as if indicating he wanted out now. "I came here to pin you against a wall and show you what I'm really made of, asshole." Sasuke muttered. The air of slight confusion and major sexual prowess on both their parts, had died down.

Rationality had brought them both to the conclusion that the other was just as perverse as himself. Both their plans had backfired one way or another, Sasuke's more than Naruto's.

Naruto laughed lightly, leaning against the wall beside his bound prey. "Oh really? You were going to show _me,_ were you? Look who's tied up to a bed post."

"Is that what I'm tied to?"

Naruto chuckled in amusement, watching the aggravated struggle between man and bindings.

Sasuke chanced a glance over his shoulder to confirm that, yes, there was indeed a four poster bed behind him. "We could make good use out of that." He suggested with a returning tease in his voice.

Naruto pouted at him through squinted eyes. "You're as perverted as Kakashi-sensei, you prick."

Sasuke scoffed in disbelief, "Who tied who up, again?"

Naruto sniffed and tossed his hands behind his head, brushing off the accusation. "I was just gonna rattle you up a bit, see what your reaction was I guess."

"Is that so?"

"Hn."

"Come a little closer and I'll show you my reaction."

Naruto grabbed a pillow and beat it across the defenseless Uchiha's face. "I'm going to leave you tied up there until your dick stops talking." He threatened.

Sasuke chuckled, a deep genuine chuckle. He lowered his head a bit and allowed himself a bit of mindfulness into his thought process. "Dobe." he murmured softly. "Come here." He insisted, leaning forward against his bonds as much as he could.

The blonde brooding boy approached cautiously, arms still crossed over his chest as he pouted. Sasuke smiled fondly, then craned his neck to lean down and kiss one plump scarred cheek. "I'm sorry I always make fun of you."

"I'm not sorry I make fun of you."

"I know, you don't have to be." He smirked lightly, thumping his forehead against the blonde mass of chaotic hair.

A satisfied smile from the younger boy was his reply. Naruto began to release the chakra ropes one at a time. "Sorry bout your shirt."

Sasuke glanced at it once he was free of his ties. "Yeah... I liked this shirt. You owe me a new one, dobe."

"Like I could afford it. You're rich, ya pansy. Buy your own shirt." Naruto snapped, kicking the last of the ropes away and crossing his arms.

"Hmph." Sasuke didn't argue that, and only landed a fist onto the top of Naruto's head with a thud. "Come on. I hate parties."

"I know, that's why I forced you here."

"I figured. So can we go now?"

"Yeah. I suppose. Not really the ending I was expecting, but it's not bad I guess." He smirked up to the dark eyed boy. "You?"

"I'm happy with the night's events."

"Even walking in on Kiba and Shino?"

"You were _there?_"

"I set it up."

"... And Neji?"

"Set that up, too."

"The drunk fangirls?"

"All me."

"Kiba streaking?"

"He didn't need a lot of convincing, actually."

"You will get your payback in tenfold."

Naruto smirked, "You wouldn't kill me. And I guarantee that I can handle anything else you dish out." he taunted quietly as they exited the house through the bedroom window that Sasuke had been dragged through not twenty minutes ago.

"Pheh. You're such a brat."

* * *

And, because I really couldn't resist... Here is an...

* * *

OMAKE!

Kiba pulled his pants back on, a sated smile drifting in between his light giggles. Shino looked less amused and more content as he casually returned his scattered clothing to one place on the bed.

"OMG KIBA!" Ten-ten bellowed through the door, banging with an urgence.

"What?!"

"Where in this stupid little plan of yours and Naruto's did it include GAARA KILLING PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY SPIKED LEE'S DRINK?!?!"

"What?!" Kiba threw the door open, ignoring the slight "_Meep_!" coming from his nude partner. "Gaara's here?!"

"Not only is he here, but he's pissed."

In the background a light hiccup could be heard as Lee staggered down the hallway, half supported by a red faced sand nin of short stature embodying a large aura of evil.

"Yeknow, Gaaaaar...a... Theses parties ain't so bad, ya know? I think... I think you'd have fun a little if ya... if ya just embraced the spirit of your... of your... I don't feel so good..."

Kiba watched, petrified as those dark red eyes surround by black raised and stared straight into his soul. Naruto has _not_ covered this option in their rehearsal meeting.

* * *

Good, bad, somewhere in between? Was it a pointless fic? Do you still hate me for taking this long to update THE LAST CHAPTER? 


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